mind the new melons please

for those that don't know, my frontal, chestal (not a word, but so should be) region has been undergoing some fairly extensive renovations over the past month... and it has not been easy let me tell ya. i know that in the long run (oh, no pun intended there...but i will so be happy to not be running down the street smuggling two watermelons in a double sports bra contraption from hell) it will be one of the best decisions i've ever made, but right now i'm only like 56.8% pleased.

{sigh}

i had these rather (and in hindsight somewhat bizarre) visions that somehow the reduction would be a quick heal and be off on my merry way. of course, i somehow also thought that i'd wake up a size 8 or a 10 (excuse me, can you add an ass reduction to my order?)... unfortunately, i think what's happening is that by nipping and tucking one thing is causing other things to look even bigger. damn mirror.

what's worse is i *should* be primarily worried about my health and healing and all that... instead i'm wondering if my bathing suits will fit better this summer and if these bizarre, ridiculous shirts they're selling all over the place (which basically make you look pregnant...dangerous territory for a girl who's married for four years) will fit... god, i'd die if someone was like, 'oh, when are you expecting?' i think i'd positively go all karate kid on their ass.

*a-n-y-h-o-w*